Dec 11 2016 - Christmas and the Forgiving Spirit

Today is the 3^rd Sunday of Advent – this Sunday we light the candle of JOY – Isaiah 55:12 “For you will go out with joy, And be led forth with peace; The mountains and the hills will break forth into shouts of joy before you, And all the trees of the field will clap their hands.

Lord, as we light these candles, we are reminded that it gets brighter and brighter as we approach Your birth – You are the light of the world and in You is no darkness at all. There is JOY found it You – joy that can’t be explained, even when there are not happy circumstances. I pray that those who see us would see Christmas shining through – there is a lot of depression and sadness – help us to be lights of joy. Help us to have joy – not the type that comes from worldly prosperity, but that which comes from knowing You.

Luke 1:76 “And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High; For you will go on before the Lord to prepare His ways; 77 To give to His people the knowledge of salvation By the forgiveness of their sins,

This is written about John the Baptist. His entire role is to point to Jesus – from his conception to his death, the entirety of His life is to point to Jesus.

Just like Advent is a time to prepare the way for Christmas, so John the Baptist prepared the world to receive Jesus Christ.

The focus – preparing us for the forgiveness of sins. Today, we will look at “Christmas and the Forgiving Spirit.”

This is a critical time to think about forgiveness. All of us have some forgiveness issues – one way or another. Either we are people who feel guilty about everything and need to experience forgiveness – or we are people who have been sinned against and need to offer forgiveness – or most likely, both.

There is something wrong with the world. It is not just now, but all through history. Whether 10, 100 or 2000 years ago, there are things that are desperately wrong with the world and all of humankind.

In this prophecy about John – we see what it is called – Sin.

It can come in the form of racism or bullying or terrorism or lying – it comes in many faces – and we all wear them. It might not be THAT face of sin – but it is THIS face of sin. Sin is rebellion against God and all of His ways. We all have, and we all will – therefore, we have a desperate need to experience God’s forgiveness.

One of the key sources for the problem of sin is that we fail to believe that God is good and His love and mercy cover all that we have done. If we go back to the first sin in the Garden, it comes back to them failing to understand and believe that God is good – and when we do that, we try to take things into our own hands and do things our way, and not God’s way.

If we do this – fail to believe – then His rules and commands become things that keep us from experiencing life the way we think we need to to enjoy it, but the reality is that God’s do’s and don’ts are the things that lead us to the good life. We need to look at them through the lens of His love.

My hope for us – is that we would gain a deep understanding of God’s love and forgiveness that it removes all of the guilt and shame we live with and experience.

Guilt has tremendous negative consequences on our lives – it is destructive. Destructive to our health and destructive to our spiritual lives.

To experience forgiveness – we must acknowledge that we have sinned. We need to look at ourselves and admit that there are problems. There is a difference between guilt and conviction. Guilt is this feeling of not being good enough. Conviction is this sense of having done something wrong and leads us to experiencing forgiveness. That is good – because it moves us to confess. Once we do that, we are supposed to be rid of guilt. And this brings us back to intimate relationship with God that changes everything.

It is easy to not appreciate that all of our sins have been forgiven. As we go through here – I have some encouraging verses on this topic – and we will look at some items in relation to forgiveness that we went over six years ago.

I had a problem with this. I grew up in a church that focused on guilt. It was a great motivator – but in the long run – it is more harmful.

These are verses that I have through the years.

Isaiah 43:25 “I, even I, am the one who wipes out your transgressions for My own sake,

And I will not remember your sins.

Do you know why it is important for you to understand your forgiveness? God wants you to. He is not interested in your sin. “For His own sake” – and yours – but He wants to forgive you.

“…and will never think of them again.” We think about them again and again -

God simply will not think about your sin – he is done with them.

Like Bernie to Hillary – everyone is sick and tired about hearing about your emails! God is sick and tired of hearing about our sin.

Why do you keep bringing these back up in your mind? They are gone.

Isaiah 1:18 “Come now, and let us reason together,” Says the Lord, “Though your sins are as scarlet, They will be as white as snow; Though they are red like crimson, They will be like wool.

This indelible stain is completely clean. We are no longer damaged goods. We are clean – we are white – the stain of sin has been completely removed.

Psalm 103:11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, So great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.

How high is that? It just keeps going.

As far as the east is from the west,

So far has He removed our transgressions from us.

How far? As far as possible. Your sins have been completely removed – totally removed – from His heart and mind.

He has removed the judgment – or the penalty of our sins – He has removed the shame that we live in because of what we have done wrong – and He has removed the ultimate consequences of our sin. Yes, there are still immediate consequences. Lying and untruthfulness – which is sin – ruin relationships and trust. Jesus dying on the cross does not remove that. There are lots of things that will still be experienced because of sin – but the ultimate consequences are gone. He will redeem all of it – everything in time – and ultimately will – even the biggest mistakes and greatest blunders we have made.

Micah 7:18 Who is a God like You, who pardons iniquity

And passes over the rebellious act of the remnant of His possession?

He does not retain His anger forever,

Because He delights in unchanging love.

19 He will again have compassion on us;

He will tread our iniquities under foot.

Yes, You will cast all their sins

Into the depths of the sea.

He pardons our iniquities because He enjoys pardoning us no matter what we do. What does God do for fun? He ENJOYS pardoning your sins! He delights in it! We talk a lot about God being our father – but this is the Grandparent aspect of God. The grandparent delights in unchanging love – loving us for loving us’ sake. It means so much for Him to love you.

We need this as the foundation of our lives. This understanding of God needs to be the controlling aspect of life – recognizing that God loves loving us.

That moves us to the next part – being able to forgive.

Matthew 6:12 ‘And forgive us our (sins) debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors (those who sin against us).

13 ‘And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.’

14 For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.

There is an intimate connection between our ability of experiencing God’s forgiveness of us with our willingness to forgive others – and it creates a cycle where we sense and know God’s forgiveness and that bleeds into us forgiving others – and then experiencing forgiveness and forgiving others… - BUT – the cycle can go the other way. If we don’t experience God’s forgiveness we don’t offer it and then we don’t experience it more…

It can turn into a death spiral going down – or a life spiral – going up, when we experience God’s forgiveness.

Holiday season – this verse becomes more practical than probably any other time. We tend to be around our families and that is where our deepest wounds often come. Yes, there is sometimes the random stranger who hurts us…

The remaining part of the message is something Cindy and I went through six years ago – The Art of Forgiveness – Lewis Smedes

First – we forget we have been forgiven.

When we forgive we are most like God.

Forgiving is good for us.

“Forgiving is an event inside a heart that hurts, and it happens only when we don’t want to hurt anymore.”

Not forgiving hurts US.

Forgiveness begins the process of healing inside – and that process won’t happen until we forgive – we’ll just stay in the wound. It will remain and we will live in it until we begin the process of forgiving.

If you are tired of hurting, it is time to begin the process of forgiving.

Because it is so hard – you need help. A friend. A counselor. A pastor or ministry leader, or a spouse.

When something has been held inside for a long time – and for some, it can be fifty or sixty years!

In that case – don’t go it alone. It doesn’t have to be a professional counselor – but it could be.

That is what the church is supposed to be about.

“Only the wounded are qualified to forgive”

I cannot pressure you to forgive. You can learn ABOUT forgiveness – but it is up to you to decide. You can make a child say they are sorry – but you cannot make a child be sorry. It has to come from within their own heart.

We cannot wait or expect an apology before we start the forgiving process. Why? Because it isn’t coming! Why would you still be waiting? As we wait for it to come – do you know what we do? We stall our own healing – a roadblock. That is what forgiveness is.

You can forgive someone even if they don’t want you to! If you want revenge – forgive when they don’t want you to! And I don’t mean that – but it leads to the next point

“We rediscover the humanity of the person who hurt us” and in time we learn to bless them. We tend to view the person who hurt us through the wound they hurt us with – and we no longer see the person as a person – but sometimes, they become a monster in our mind or heart. There are monsters – and that may be a different topic – but most often – someone who wounds us is simply a failed human, loved by God and created in His image.

Most often, that is the case. When we begin the process of forgiving, we re-dignify them –to see them as those God loves.

“forgiving is completed in the mind of the person who forgives. When we forgive, we see the person who wounded us as a fellow human being worthy of our love, and in that sense, we reconcile ourselves to him.”

Reconciling and embracing our two different things. Some are not safe – and it is okay to not have a relationship with that person – that is fine and healthy – but you can still forgive.

“When we forgive someone, we surrender our right to get even.”

Vengeance is not mine – it is the Lord’s! We want the person who wounded to feel the pain we felt and more – and we want them to understand that the reason they feel that pain is because of what they did to us – that is what vengeance is. We want them to KNOW – but when we forgive, we release that right.

“We forgive persons for what they do, not for what they are.”

All people are wounded, flawed people with shortcomings and quirks. We can’t forgive that (shortcomings) – but we can forgive specific deeds that they have done against us. There is a difference. Not every action a person does is against you.

When they squeeze the toothpaste from the wrong spot – hopefully they are not doing this against you – you can say that about so many different things – leaving the toilet seat up or down or sideways –

Those things we cover over in love.

We cannot minimize forgiveness by forgiving things that aren’t forgivable.

We forgive people who wound us seriously – my wife calls this the quality of a large spirit. The ability to cover over the brokenness and flaws of those around us. Are you good at that? Do you have a large spirit? That is important to possess.

“We forgive people who wound us seriously”

Matthew 18: 21 Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus *said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”

Jesus is saying – if you are counting – you are not forgiving.

23 “For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. 24 When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. 25 But since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded him to be sold, along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made. 26 So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you everything.’ 27 And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt.

This is what forgiveness is all about – having compassion and RELEASING them of the debt that they owe you. Recognizing the person who needs to be forgiven as a fellow struggler.

What we do when we don’t forgive – we continually repeat the wound – the act, the deed – and in doing that –we allow it to wound us over and over again. Every time we repeat it – it hurts us. So we need to release the person in our hearts.

28 But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ 29 So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you.’ 30 But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owed. 31 So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their lord all that had happened. 32 Then summoning him, his lord said to him, ‘You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’ 34 And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. 35 My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”

God is the one who forgave us all the debt. We must come to the point where we understand that our debt to God is enormous – something we could never repay (and this is where forgiveness begins – saying this about yourself). If you don’t have that capacity – you will never experience His forgiveness nor the joy of forgiving and releasing others.

To the extent we see how much God has forgiven us – and that keeps growing. We think – early on – when we come to Christ- but then later – we think, I’m not so bad – I’m probably better than most! And it destroys us. We need to be like this man – forgiven a great debt – and to appreciate what He has done.