April 30 2017 Getting Ahead 2 - but not at Another's Expense

Early in my Christian life – I really related to Jacob – and I’m sure there are things in his life that we can all relate to.

Let’s pray – Lord, thank You for this opportunity to be before You and to worship You as a congregation and a community of faith. As we look at Your word, do a work in our own lives – transformed more and more into the image of Christ – to be united with You in Your death and resurrection in our daily lives. May others see that we are different – and that difference to be Christ in us – different in a good way – like You. Make us like You.

We are focusing on Getting Ahead – and the good and bad ways that can be done. Getting ahead is not necessarily a bad thing - the issue is – how do we do it? And we see in Jacob a lot of the wrong ways.

Jacob and Esau are twins – they are the children of Isaac and Rebekah – she had been barren – and while they were expecting – the Lord spoke a word to Rebekah that the children would be in conflict and that the younger would supplant the older and this word from God created all kinds of conflicts in this family – this is a family in conflict.

Gen. 27:When Isaac was old and his eyes were so weak that he was almost blind, he called his older son Esau and said to him, "My son!" "Here I am!" Esau replied. 2 Isaac said, "Since I am so old, I could die at any time. 3 Therefore, take your weapons– your quiver and your bow– and go out into the open fields and hunt down some wild game for me. 4 Then prepare for me some tasty food, the kind I love, and bring it to me. Then I will eat it so that I may bless you before I die."

So there is this situation – God had spoken to Rebekah and said you are having twins and the younger will supplant the older – and Isaac was never happy with that. That is not how things are done! We don’t know – the word came to Rebekah – and think of Isaac – maybe he didn’t believe her – but Isaac, in this situation – is trying to rewrite what Rebekah had said God spoke to her about. This blessing – at the end of one’s life – in their culture – was very important. These are not just words being spoken on a deathbed. There is tremendous power in the blessing and it ties generations together. There is real power in giving a blessing to kids. I had the opportunity to pray a blessing for my 1 year old grandson yesterday. When we give words of affirmation – this has power and can be life-shaping. A person who never gets words of affirmation from their parents – that will shape their lives in a negative way. There are people in their eighties who are still seeking those words from a parent who has been dead for decades. This builds self-esteem and security – but it was much more than that for them. These words had actual power to accomplish what is being spoken. They believed – this is what is going to happen – as the father would bless the son. “This symbolic action has genuine abiding power,” one writer wrote.

Like Jesus saying – speak and this mountain will be cast into the sea – speak and it will happen – that is how they understood this to be.

5 Now Rebekah had been listening while Isaac spoke to his son Esau.

Rebekah is snooping – and as we saw last week – snooping is a sign of control issues. Snoopers can be control freaks and manipulators.

When Esau went out to the open fields to hunt down some wild game and bring it back, 6 Rebekah said to her son Jacob, "Look, I overheard your father tell your brother Esau, 7 'Bring me some wild game and prepare for me some tasty food. Then I will eat it and bless you in the presence of the LORD before I die.' 8 Now then, my son, do exactly what I tell you!

So Rebekah – she hears this – and is saying – wait a minute, Isaac (notice, there is no conversation between the two of them! – there may not have been one for 20 years! Their marriage is a mess!) Jacob gets his scheming honestly! And he gets it from his mother! Your kids get their issues honestly – from you! It is not like they are not getting that from you!

Both Rebekah and Isaac are trying to take things into their own hands. They are taking things out of God’s hands and into their own. The question – would God have been able to do it without Rebekah’s deceit? There is only one answer to that! Yes! God is saying – I don’t need you to bring about what I want to bring about.

One of Jesus’ temptations in the wilderness was to take things into His own hands. If you’re hungry (which He was; He had been fasting for forty days!) command these stones to turn into bread!

You have the power to do this! But is it yours to do? Just because you CAN do it doesn’t mean it is yours to do. Jesus could have turned the stones into bread – but He didn’t.

Abraham and Sarah couldn’t have children – and didn’t have their first child until they were approaching 100 years old – and they took things into their own hands. Sarah gave her maidservant to Abraham – but God didn’t need that. We do things like this in our own ways. And we see it with Isaac and Rebekah – and it gets even worse with Jacob – who has two wives who give him their maidservants to have more children with! It is not just this situation – but the entire human race is always trying to take things out of God’s hands and into our own.

The Psalmist says – Cease striving and know that I am God. He is in control - not me. One thing I know – there is a God – and I am not Him!

God wants us to act – to take initiative – to work – but to not take control. Cease striving does not mean that we are lazy – we must work like a child working alongside his parent. Paul said, work out your salvation with fear and trembling as I work in you for My good pleasure. There is work to be done.

When you teach your child to cook when they are little – they don’t do all of it – but they are learning and helping – or else you will have too much!

To paraphrase Henri Nouwen - Control is an easy substitute for the hard work of love – it is easy to control people – making someone feel guilty or shamed to change their behavior is much easier than love to get them to change.

We rely so heavily on guilt and shame. God does not. People – religious people – Christian people – rely on guilt and shame – but not God. God knows that Love changes things. But it is hard work and takes a long time. The change that comes from guilt and shame is bad change that does not last and usually makes the behavior worse. That is not a good life to live – when character is formed by guilt and shame.

How do we know if we have taken things out of God’s hand into our own?

• 1)– If your primary focus is on results. Results are important – but the primary result God wants is for us to be people who trust Him – those who have an intimate relationship with Him and that we trust Him
• 2)When we are unable to create margins or space in our life for quiet – solitude for reflection of God’s character and His love for us. If you do not have time to spend with God – for me – it is getting to bed while Cindy is getting ready for bed – for that ten/15 minutes/hour and a half…. It could be in your car, getting ready for work.

Psalm 37:Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong;…

What is your fret level? It can be an indicator. What is your envious level?

3 Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.

How much can you rest in the NOW and enjoy what God has given you NOW? Can you live in the moment and enjoy God in that moment?

4 Take delight in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

5 Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this:…

7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.

BE still! Wait patiently! How good are you at waiting patiently? That word WAIT is used so often – wait for Me, God says – and we don’t want to wait for ANYTHING, let alone God!

8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret--it leads only to evil.

A couple more practical things – from Emotionally Healthy Spirituality – which we went through a few years ago:

When I do God’s work to satisfy me, not God.

When my prayers are about God doing my will, not me surrendering to His.

When I demonstrate Christian behavior so significant people think well of me

When I use the truth to judge and devalue others

When I exaggerate my accomplishments to compete with others

When I hide behind God-talk, deflecting any spotlight on my inner cracks…

Genesis 27:

9 Go to the flock and get me two of the best young goats. I'll prepare them in a tasty way for your father, just the way he loves them. 10 Then you will take it to your father. Thus he will eat it and bless you before he dies." 11 "But Esau my brother is a hairy man," Jacob protested to his mother Rebekah, "and I have smooth skin! 12 My father may touch me! Then he'll think I'm mocking him and I'll bring a curse on myself instead of a blessing."

Jacob is not concerned about the deceit – he is concerned about getting caught.

13 So his mother told him, "Any curse against you will fall on me, my son! Just obey me! Go and get them for me!"

Wow – Rebekah really loves Jacob – She is not letting go of this – she said she would take the curse – and this came true. She never saw the son she loved again or any of her grandchildren. She is never mentioned again except for where she is buried!

14 So he went and got the goats and brought them to his mother. She prepared some tasty food, just the way his father loved it. 15 Then Rebekah took her older son Esau's best clothes, which she had with her in the house, and put them on her younger son Jacob. 16 She put the skins of the young goats on his hands and the smooth part of his neck.

17 Then she handed the tasty food and the bread she had made to her son Jacob.18 He went to his father and said, "My father!" Isaac replied, "Here I am. Who are you, my son?"

These words will come back to haunt him the rest of his life. Someone else will ask ‘Who are you?’ He carries this for decades.

19 Jacob said to his father, "I am Esau, your firstborn. I've done as you told me. Now sit up and eat some of my wild game so that you can bless me." 20 But Isaac asked his son, "How in the world did you find it so quickly, my son?" "Because the LORD your God brought it to me," he replied.

Jacob’s first mention of God and it is someone else’s – not his God, yet.

21 Then Isaac said to Jacob, "Come closer so I can touch you, my son, and know for certain if you really are my son Esau." 22 So Jacob went over to his father Isaac, who felt him and said, "The voice is Jacob's, but the hands are Esau's."

Either Esau was REALLY HAIRY or Isaac is REALLY SENILE. This sounds so ludicrous! They put a goat skin on him!

23 He did not recognize him because his hands were hairy, like his brother Esau's hands. So Isaac blessed Jacob. 24 Then he asked, "Are you really my son Esau?" "I am," Jacob replied. 25 Isaac said, "Bring some of the wild game for me to eat, my son. Then I will bless you." So Jacob brought it to him, and he ate it. He also brought him wine, and Isaac drank.

26 Then his father Isaac said to him, "Come here and kiss me, my son." 27 So Jacob went over and kissed him. When Isaac caught the scent of his clothing, he blessed him, saying, "Yes, my son smells like the scent of an open field which the LORD has blessed. 28 May God give you the dew of the sky and the richness of the earth, and plenty of grain and new wine. 29 May peoples serve you and nations bow down to you. You will be lord over your brothers, and the sons of your mother will bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed, and those who bless you be blessed."

So Isaac gives the blessing to Jacob, thinking it is Esau – and all is done.

30 Isaac had just finished blessing Jacob, and Jacob had scarcely left his father's presence, when his brother Esau returned from the hunt. 31 He also prepared some tasty food and brought it to his father. Esau said to him, "My father, get up and eat some of your son's wild game. Then you can bless me." 32 His father Isaac asked, "Who are you?" "I am your firstborn son," he replied, "Esau!"

33 Isaac began to shake violently

Remember, this blessing is irrevocable! He had been deceived! Have you ever been deceived – this is the ultimate deception.

33 Isaac began to shake violently and asked, "Then who else hunted game and brought it to me? I ate all of it just before you arrived, and I blessed him. He will indeed be blessed!" 34 When Esau heard his father's words, he wailed loudly and bitterly. He said to his father, "Bless me too, my father!" 35 But Isaac replied, "Your brother came in here deceitfully and took away your blessing."

36 Esau exclaimed, "'Jacob' is the right name for him! He has tripped me up two times! He took away my birthright, and now, look, he has taken away my blessing!" Then he asked, "Have you not kept back a blessing for me?" 37 Isaac replied to Esau, "Look! I have made him lord over you. I have made all his relatives his servants and provided him with grain and new wine. What is left that I can do for you, my son?"

Esau takes not responsibility – Esau gave it to him –

Everyone needs a blessing. Esau lost it.

38 Esau said to his father, "Do you have only that one blessing, my father? Bless me too!" Then Esau wept loudly. 39 So his father Isaac said to him, "Indeed, your home will be away from the richness of the earth, and away from the dew of the sky above. 40 You will live by your sword but you will serve your brother. When you grow restless, you will tear off his yoke from your neck."

The story all of a sudden flips. I think at this point we have sympathy for Esau – and I think that is done purposely – God wants this. It seems all unfair – and all of a sudden, this weird thing happens – and Isaac DOES give a blessing – ‘you will throw his yoke off of you.’

I think we cannot accept paradox and mystery. We want one thing to be right, and another to be wrong – one person to be good and another bad – one to be in, one to be out. And God lets us know really quickly that it is just not this way. We’ll see problem after problem that Jacob gets himself into.

It is rarely that way – think of a marriage – it is rarely one person’s issue – it is usually both – and yes, I understand there are circumstances when this is not true – but generally. But at the end of the story – Esau is wealthy – and when they meet decades later – the oddest thing – Esau is the good guy! His response – He forgives Jacob completely – and he wants to bless Jacob and take care of him. What is that all about – and this is it – the most important lesson from this story:

IT IS NEVER ABOUT OUR WORTHINESS AND SOMEONE ELSE’S UNWORTHINESS. Jacob is not given the promise because he is good, but because God loves him and wants to be gracious to him. And it is the same for us. We are not more worthy than anyone else. God just wants to be gracious to us because He loves us.

Understanding God’s grace, His promise, love, and faithfulness to us – as we understand that – our need to manipulate, control, and take things into our own hands will simply disappear