Ways We Brag and Boast and What to Do about it!

Lord, thank You that we are faultless before You – because of what Jesus did on the cross – You paid for our sins – in Your name we pray – amen!

Welcome this morning – We became grandparents again yesterday – a cute little black haired Marette – that’s a first –

2 Cor. 11: 16 Again I say, let no one think me foolish; but if you do, receive me even as foolish, so that I also may boast a little. 17 What I am saying, I am not saying as the Lord would, but as in foolishness, in this confidence of boasting. 18 Since many boast according to the flesh, I will boast also. 19 For you, being so wise, tolerate the foolish gladly.

Boasting comes up in the 2 letters 34 times! The Corinthians have a problem with boasting. You might ask – what is he doing? He is being sarcastic and pointed – you have a bunch of people who are boasting according to the flesh…

18 Since many boast according to the flesh, I will boast also.

Let’s get this out on the table and I am going to make fun of it – in a serious and yet gentle way – throwing a little levity into the situation. The word ‘Foolish’ appears here 4 times.
Boasting is simply foolishness – and the person who brags is simply without understanding.

They are foolish, foolish people.

When we talk about boasting, we think of the arrogant, obnoxious braggart – and we tend to not like those who do it or ourselves when we do it. I think we all struggle with it. We have gotten so good we can make boasting look like humility. I think the reality of it is we are unaware that we do it! Boasting has anything that we do to draw attention to ourselves instead of the Lord.

2 Cor. 10: 17 But he who boasts is to boast in the Lord. 18 For it is not he who commends himself that is approved, but he whom the Lord commends.

When we seek approval for ourselves – we are boasting – rather than our approval coming from the Lord. Our tendency is so that others will recognize our abilities – or compensating for perceived or real deficiencies – as a child, or whatever, there are points in our lives where we don’t get the attention we need – and we have been formed (or deformed) by what we have missed – and we do this through different forms of boasting.

1 Cor. 4:7 For who regards you as superior? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as if you had not received it?

Boasting is about the need to feel superior. We puff ourselves up. Paul talks about that. And basically, we go back to the animal kingdom – the males – during mating season – be it the peacocks with the feathers – they puff themselves up and then they ram into one another.
This is also done in subtle ways – ways we demonstrate superiority.

Cindy said to me – When I say – I can’t believe that person would say or do that – it is a form of boasting – saying that someone else is inferior – trying to make ourselves superior. That is boasting. That is what is happening with this attitude of superiority.
Boasting is also about gaining attention. We drill this into our children – “You are so smart!”

Cindy is a teacher – and that is something you don’t say! You compliment something they have done – you don’t say – You are so beautiful either – this has nothing to do with a person’s character – and that is what we need to focus on. Like the good athletes who are not very good people – it happens all the time.

Think of people who have relational deficiencies – they attempt to excel and boast about other areas they excel in – because of these – they are unable to relationally connect and last. We all know people like that. We all are people like that sometimes!

Sometimes we boast to get our way – there is the aggressive way – and the subtle way – like the person who mopes around until he gets his way. It comes from the same core. Our deficiencies – problems and sins – reveal themselves on two opposite sides of the same problem. All sins are like this. Based on our personality defines how they come out.

Jeremiah 9:23 Thus says the Lord, “Let not a wise man boast of his wisdom, and let not the mighty man boast of his might, let not a rich man boast of his riches; 24 but let him who boasts boast of this, that he understands and knows Me, that I am the Lord who exercises lovingkindness, justice and righteousness on earth; for I delight in these things,” declares the Lord.

I memorized this way back in my Christian life – the topic was on bragging or boasting – we tend to boast in intelligence – let not the wise boast in his wisdom. The most obnoxious are those who let you know their SAT scores when they are 65! It doesn’t mean so much – how many degrees do they have – or in a social context – someone gives their title – I respond back with Reverend Marette. I know I shouldn’t do that, Jesus wouldn’t do that, but I’m not perfect like Jesus yet!

Here is how we tend to do it – we believe and we communicate that our knowledge and understanding of something is superior or more right than others – therefore, everyone else should accept what we say! That is how we boast in our wisdom as normal people. We have so many areas in which we do this. From the trivial – (who makes the best draft choices!) to who raised their children better – or who is more spiritual – whose theology is superior. Some are innocent and harmless, others, not so much – very harmful.

Knowledge and wisdom is important when we share it with others to encourage and help. We should strive to be wise – but when we allow that knowledge and wisdom to create an attitude of superiority – there is a fine line between sharing to help and boasting.

In our political debates – we are bombarded with it – there are many important issues that need to be addressed in our political world – but when you watch this – it is talking over one another and boasting and puffing themselves up – and CRACK – like big horn sheep ramming each other!

We use this in leadership meetings – and this is helpful in relationships – when decisions have to be made – you have it at work, family, church, anything you are involved in – decisions need to be made and a difference of opinion – so I run this phrase through my head – this is my understanding of this subject – it does not make it right – because it is my opinion does not make it right – but it does make it important. Two different things. For an opinion to be important – everyone’s is – and it should be considered. Our tendency is to focus on right and wrong. Yes, there are things that are black and white – but we elevate way too many things to that that God never intends to be black and white. Especially in decision making and discussions. There is no right color for a room to be painted – or what car to purchase – but these are things that ruin relationships when you hold too strongly to something that is not black and white.

If you have an opinion that needs to be expressed, express it, but understand that others may disagree. There may most likely not be agreement – and when that decision is made – it might not be the one you think should be made.
Choosing a course of action does not make one opinion right and another wrong! It just means a decision had to be made.

With this – and this is so important to make relationships work – there is a difference between emotional level and conscience.

A pastor told me this story: They were in a board meeting and there was some type of user access to something that you pay for – it cost so many dollars per user. They decided to buy one user access and the two people using it would use one password. One board member – my conscience – I can’t be involved in that. Even though two of them thought they could do that – and they were not bothered by it – one was – so they chose to do it the right way.

Being emotionally attached to an opinion – is not the same as conscience. If it is not an issue of “I am sinning by doing this” – or – is it an issue you are willing to die on the hill for? Some things that affect our consciences are willing to die on the hill for. But when you are part of a decision – you just might die on the hill –
Kids do the – My dad is bigger than your dad – and that is what it is – but as adults – it bleeds into our sports teams or whatever – but when we use our influence or power in a circumstance to get our way – the worst case of this – in a church – when someone uses their money to get their way. “If we don’t do it this way – I am not giving to THAT!”
Philippians 2 - Jesus did not regard the ultimate power and strength as something to hold onto…

Where do we have power and privilege in this situation – and then we need to empty ourselves of it.

That is what it means to be like Jesus.

Don’t boast in your riches. In our free market economy – this might be the ultimate one – like Lifestyles of the rich and famous – some use money – and material things – to boast – in subtle ways we don’t recognize. We can boast about how little money we have – it is still boasting. There are those who have great wealth and never boast about it.
This is about attitude and superiority.
Jesus pointed out three areas of boasting – don’t do these things to be seen by people.

1. Don’t pray where everyone sees you – practice your spirituality in such a way so as not to draw attention to yourself.
2. Giving to the poor. We should do these things but don’t blow your horn when you do it!
3. Doing good deeds and service – it is a good thing – but not if we are doing it to be seen. Yes, sometimes you have to serve. Others may see you come to the spring cleaning day May 14! It is about the attitude.

2 Cor. 10:17 – if you want to brag about something – brag about Jesus!

Galatians 4:6

There is, in one sense – if you struggle with boasting – here is an opportunity to let it all hang out – if you boast in anything – boast in the Lord. Let’s pray…